Miss Leslie

One Good Thing a Day: Day 14: SAFETY

SAFETY

“Tag you’re it!” “I’m Safe!”

We have to retreat to places of safety sometimes - those nests that will envelope us in protection and nourishment.  For some of us, it is home. For others, a favorite park or outdoor site. For others, a bottle and a dark bar. Judge what you want about escaping – but we all need it.

The baby bird has to stay in the nest to grow their wings, build up strength, and open their eyes in order to take flight and build a life of their own. The ship in from the sea has to find a place where it will not be damaged on a rocky shore or float off on its own without someone at the helm. The child at play has to have a fence in order to not run out into the street. We have to have that place of safety until it is time to take our risks.

We could live an adventurous life – constantly taking risks without a safety net. I’ll never forget watching a TV movie about the Flying Wallendas – a family circus act that performed on the high wire without a net. I had nightmares for years about the night in 1962 that they were doing the 7 person chair pyramid and fell off killing 1, paralyzing another and injuring the third person that fell.

But why should we do that? Can we look at life for what it is – a series of risks and opportunities for growth. There are times to take those risks and times to remain in safety. And to realize that each extreme offers us no growth and no rewards. We could never take risks and stay in our safe caves, away from anything that could possibly hurt us – but how can we find new ideas, new thoughts, new ways that we can enrich our lives? We could take risks constantly and inappropriately – never seeking safety, never having reflection on the value of those risks, and lose ourselves in a life with only the shallow highs and avoiding the deep growth of the lows.

As I went for a run the other day, a baby bird was dead on the sidewalk, having fallen from the nest above. I felt sad for that loss of life, but I was touched by the value of safety and the strong need for it to be a part of our lives.

 

One Good Thing a Day: Day 13: PB&J With the Crusts Off

PEANUT BUTTER AND JELLY WITH THE CRUSTS OFF

My 9 year old still doesn’t like the crusts on his PB&J sandwiches. Moms out there can relate – it is a pain in the neck to take the crusts off. And messy. Some days you just think, “One  more thing. . . .”

But those missing crusts mean something. Mom cares. Mom lets me be me. And Mom isn’t trying to rush me into the next phase of life.

We live in a society where we are growing up fast. Kids movies are rated PG-13. Video games portray a lot of violence.  TV shows encourage being sexually enticing. Music and everything else is readily available on the web.

Don’t get me wrong – I’m not one to ask us all to go back to the 1950s or the Dark Ages. I love technology. I support it and I support it’s growth. But there is a balance there. We have to make sure that we do not lose our humanity as we advance into metal pieces and bits and bytes. And our humanity has always connected with the natural world – that world of climbing trees and jumping rope and skipping and swimming and playing pretend games thought up in our very own brains as we feel the wind in our faces.

My kids are constantly forced to face adult issues online, on TV and in movies. I have tried my best to shelter them as long as I could, but they are getting older. They are transitioning from little boys to big boys and big girl to teenage girl.

I cut off the crusts every day. He means something to me and for right now, I’m OK that he’s still my little boy.

 

One Good Thing a Day: Day 12: FREEDOM

FREEDOM

You hear the word and immediately you take a deep breath. You feel openness. You are Julie Andrews in the “Sound of Music” – running into an open field on a mountain with no restraints or constraints. You are free. You are alive.

The reality is that freedom is simply the ability to choose what master you wish to serve. Because we all are enslaved to something. Or if you would rather think of it in a different way – we all choose to be governed by some code or choose to subject our will to something else. True anarchy is impossible and does not exist. We are not free – but it is a gift to be free to CHOOSE what and who we will serve.

Our forefathers did not wish to not be governed anymore. They wanted the freedom to have local representation in their national government and they wanted the freedom to choose their own religion.  They wanted a government. They wanted a church. BUT THEY WANTED TO CHOOSE WHAT THAT WAS FOR THEMSELVES.

The mother stays with the nursing infant. The daughter chooses to take care of her aging parent. The wife chooses to stay in an unhappy marriage to keep her kids with their father. The citizen of the country chooses to follow the laws because they believe in the national government of which they are a part.

But there are those moments when freedom comes to you and takes you to a new place in life that is exhilarating and transforming. You get out of a bad relationship. You give up being enslaved to anger for a wrong and forgive someone. You try something completely out of your comfort zone – and succeed. You quit a job that has been a source of negativity for a long time.

We all serve something. Freedom is the ability to choose what you will serve. It is never easy – for all choices to serve something require sacrifice.

Happy 4^th of July everyone. Be thankful that we can choose. Be grateful for your circumstances. And if you don’t like them, then declare your freedom and choose something else. You will still have to sacrifice part of yourself. You will still have things required of you. But there are enough choices available that you can find peace in your life.

 

One Good Thing a Day: Day 11

GIVING

Well dangit, I didn’t write a “One Good Thing a Day” on Sunday. . . . I was at a benefit for Randy Cornor, a local guitar player that had a single that went to #9 on the Hot Country Singles chart in the 70s. He also worked with Gene Watson and Frenchie Burke. Tons of musicians came to play, listen and hang out. And fans packed the place.

I am not saying this in a bragging or boastful way, but I am, by nature, a benevolent person. I have been this way since I was a child. My oldest daughter has this same inherent quality, so I know that some people just come by it naturally.  But regardless of our capacity for giving, we all possess the ability to give – whether it is love, time, energy, attention, or money, we all can give.

One of my favorite books in the entire world is called “Forgiveness And Other Acts of Love” by Stephanie Dowrick. As I was thinking about giving, I decided to pull out the book and re-read the chapter on Generosity. And as I read, I realized that there is an energy in giving. It is this spirit that lives within us but also finds its way to connect each of us and expand our Selves – if only for the moment that we are in that energy.  Stephanie writes:

“Those moments of giving, of passing something from me to you, have their value also. They can arise out of and express moments of sparkling creativity: ‘I have chosen this – this, and nothing else.’ They may provide healing and humour. They may provoke wonder. They may express authentic care and interest. But they cannot replace a willingness to be present: to listen, to watch, to touch, to think, to talk, to pause, to care. They cannot replace a willingness to give time, and to be present in that time with an open heart: ‘In the end, all I have left is love. . . ‘”

You find yourself at a place where you stop and you give. You attend a benefit for someone with medical bills. You take 10 minutes on the couch to cuddle with your child. You stop and listen to your partner share about the day that they had. You smile at someone that just looks like they need a smile.

If we all gave in small ways, our world could be a much, much better place. For, in the heart of giving, lies our ability to recognize our own humanity. We get in touch with the knowledge that we all share the same spirit with feelings. If we could all stay in touch with this, there would be no reason for war or starvation or hatred or human-induced pain.

Can we give? Can we connect? Can we Love?

It does wonders for the Soul. If you were there on Sunday, you would know the “One Good Thing a Day” that I had that day. . . .