I know I just put up a blog. But the dialog about staying in the music business for the long haul on my MySpace blog got me to thinking about persistence. And then I was writing an email to my best friend from high school and I thought I would share.
My Mom made little cards for all of us at this last Thanksgiving that said what she was thankful for about all of us. Mine said my “perseverance”. It was funny to me that I did not think about myself as being persevering until I read that. It has continually echoed in my head since then. I just don't give up. I continually try new things and new ways to try and be successful.
Like when my daughter, Hannah, went through the terrible twos. She had the WORST tantrums. I could see it come over her - her eyes would get this look. She was going to explode. I remember being in the mall holding Ethan as a baby. Hannah was screaming and hitting her fists on the floor. I kept asking her if she was done yet. She said no and screamed some more. I asked her again. Still no. Finally I asked if she was done and she said yes and crying (in a calm way) crawled in my lap.
It doesn't mean it's not stressful. My body would be so completely tense after one of those tantrums. And the ones in public were the worst – people staring, etc. But I knew that my daughter’s tantrums weren’t manipulative. They were an expression of something inside that she couldn’t control.
I’ve been through other situations in my life where it wasn’t easy. Situations where I needed to stay with something because it was very important to me. Because it was something that I loved. Because it was a part of who I was. Music is that for me. It is a part of who I am. I could give it up – but I would be giving up that part of myself. Realizing WHY you are doing something is almost as important as doing something. The why is what makes you stay or go. The why is what makes you try harder or give up completely. The why is everything.
My friend, Tom Lewis, plays drums for Heybale. The first gig he played with us was at a huge dancehall and 13 people showed up. Tom is a fellow sarcastic wit. I looked around and said, “I should just quit.”
He said, “Yeah, but no one would notice.”
I about fell over laughing and continually retell that story as a joke.
But I believe that it is the most important lesson that a musician (or anyone for that matter can learn). Look at WHY you are doing this thing. If it is for fame or money or recognition, it doesn’t last. Understand WHY you play music. If the answer is because you love it with all of your soul, then there is no point in entertaining a notion of quitting. Move on. Go to the next thing. Keep doing what you’re doing. WHY?
Because you love it.
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